One of the nice things about being a teacher is the ongoing contact we have with our students.

 

Today I was sent this photo of Emily, one of my students in China.  Peter and I are still in contact with many of the students we had in China, and Emily was at Longyan University, which was our first teaching job in  China. While we were there, the students became our surrogate children.

Weddings in China are very different to weddings in the West. One of the big cultural differences between the East and the West is this:

In the West, people fall in love then marry.

In the East, (China anyway) usually people marry then hopefully fall in love.

Arranged marriages are still quite common, not so much in the sense that the bride and groom have no say in the matter, but marriages are often based on social and financial grounds. Generally, the groom will be introduced to different girls by his family, and eventually he will choose one. Ideally it should be a girl that the family thinks is suitable on all levels, and one that will fit into their own particular social sphere.

When a young man is introduced by a family member to a prospective bride, there will be a meeting arranged where the adults will be there, and the girl and boy look at each other and decide if they want to take it any further. Sometimes the prospective bride and groom will not even speak to each other, just look. If the groom likes the look of the bride, he will arrange for a family member to tell the girl and her family, and then he will ask her out, usually to dinner.

They will then spend quite some time getting to know one another. Sometimes these pairs will eventually marry and sometimes they realise they are not suited so it ends.

Emily, above, is not yet married. They will sign the marriage papers some weeks or months before the wedding party, and they spend another day or two having photos taken so a very beautiful photo album is compiled. They will usually have all this done and the photo album ready for their wedding day. This is the day of what we would call the 'wedding reception'. They have a large party and invite all their friends and relatives. There are often several hundred people at the wedding party.

Food is a very important part of Chinese culture and at a wedding there is a huge amount of food that comes out over the period of one or two hours. Eveyone sits at tables, usually ten to a table and enjoys a wonderful feast. There are other customs involved, and at the end of a very long day, the couple are considered to be married in the Chinese style.

Many of our Chinese students are getting married as this is an auspicious year for marriage and for babies according to the Chinese calendar, so we are getting more photos like the one above from students getting married.

Doesn't she look lovely?