Keeping it moving.

I wrote a post a week or so ago about using the exercycle. Well I am doing okay. I am doing 5 or 6 days a week, and trying to do over 40 kms a week, not a lot but it will increase.

However, I have found that with a bit of skill I can read while I am on the bike. While my legs are doing the up/down bit, my hands are free so they can hold a book. I am reading a book at the moment called 'No way to behave at a funeral' by Noel Braun. An odd title, but actually a very good book.It is the story of his coping with the suicide death of his wife of over 40 years. Probably every one of us has been touched by suicide in some way or another, and it seems to be a growing problem espcially with the increasingly stressful lives so many people live.

One of the most interesting points for me, was that he was trained in mental health and also a Lifeline counsellor, but he was not able to stop the suicide of his wife. I don't say this in a condemning way at all, but I thought it very pertinent, because most of us don't have any training in this field, and the guilt of 'why didn't I stop it?' is a constant cloud following those close to the deceased person. If trained people can't stop it, what hope have you and I got, especially when the depressed person is absolutely intent on ending their lives?

Noel Braun is very open about his feelings, and how he slowly worked his way through the whole grieving process. I have not got to the end yet, but it really is a good read. He not only had to deal with his wife's death, but his son got married one week later, and he had to try and work his way through the wedding too.

Men are usually so closed up about such topics, keeping the 'stiff upper lip' etc. Its refreshing to see into a man's thoughts and feelings in such a situation.

Actually in regard to stress, I have to say that as long as you have the personality for it, are okay with change, but open to a bit of excitment and minor challenges without blowing your stack, house sitting has become a stress free way of life for me. Our living costs are low. We don't pay rent, but depending on the length of the house sit, we sometimes offer to pay for power and/or internet connections. This means we have a bit of spare cash for sightseeing, going out for a meal here and there, going to the movies, things that you can't always do on the pension. We generally have really  nice homes to care for, sometimes pets to care for, and stay in some beautiful areas. For me, so far, its a pretty stress free way of living.

The olympics are on. I loathe them.

The olympics have started in London. It has been very interesting to see the lead up to this four yearly event. There was a very self-disclosing comment made by some POM in the news yesterday. He said, and I sort of quote, that, 'we like to complain'. And part of the major complaints by everyone in the world about the Olympics, was that the POM's were continually complaining about everything to do with it. It is not without some substance, that certainly in New Zealand, the general nickname 'whinging POM' was lavished on all English people. By the way, POM, we were told as children mean Person Of Merit.

I'll let you in on a secret. I am three quarters POM, Mum being English born, and my father being half English.

Now, just a note on the Olympics. I didn't get to see the opening, but I did see a few bits on the news. I will have to find the opening ceremony on the internet and have a look at it. But the whole thing has nothing but nuisance value.

• It's in the middle of the night, well it starts at about 6pm, but it goes right into the wee hours
• I am going to miss lots of sleep
• I am going to have to sleep during the day to catch up
• It will completely mess up my daily schedule
• I am going to be tired
• I am going to be grumpy
• I like to listen to the ABC in bed but the programs are almost all Olympics and then....
• When I hear something exciting on the radio I have to get up and watch it, again in the middle of the night, because....
• Even the best commentator can make the most boring thing sound mind bogglingly exciting....
• And I won't know if I am missing something unless I get up and watch.
• If the Olympic committee had any brains they would have timed everything so that it suited the really important people of the world, those that live down under....therefore
• I hate the Olympics
• I loathe the Olympics
• I abhor them too
• Oh, and I hate all the ads they stick in every five minutes just to annoy the viewers who are compelled to watch all  night.

Ummm, did I mention I had a little bit of  POM in me? But I'm different. I never complain.

Attending a book launch.....Point of Rescue.

On Friday night Peter and I attended a book launch. I have never been to one of these before, and even though I have self published a couple of books, I haven't had an official launch like this.

The author is Ricky Hunter. She has had a pretty tough life, affected by sexual assault when she was 5 years old, and then experienced a violent marriage. She had six years with her husband before she left. It was much harder in the 1970's to leave your husband if you had no money etc, and to get right away she left her home country.

The main theme of her books, she has written two, which is really her life story, plus much self help material, is how it is possible to recover after facing extreme hardships in life, in her case, a violent marriage. She is a great writer, and they are the sort of books that once started you can't put down.

She had some very interesting speakers. One was a lawyer from the Family Courts, who deals with family violence all the time. Another was from RSPCA. Lots of people don't realise that there is a close relationship between people who abuse animals and people who abuse other people. A huge percentage of people who abuse their partners, also abuse animals. It seems to be one of the first things to look for. The RSPCA runs a special program called Pets in Crisis.  So if someone, and it is generally women, but not always,  want to leave a violent home situation but have nowhere for their pets to go, then RSPCA will take them for a month and care for them until the abused person gets somewhere to live. Its a great arrangement. Ricky is a strong advocate for this work by the RSPCA.

This is the team she works with, from left to right, Dawn Spinks, Ricky Hunter, Chris her P.A. Jan Sky and Gil Holmes.

So it was really interesting to talk to different people there and those involved in this kind of work. I think it takes a special kind of person to work with people suffering traumas of some sort. There were other counsellors etc there too, Jan Sky from Sydney, and the launch speech was given by Dawn Spinks, a local person very involved with counselling agencies too. All the speakers were highly qualified in their own areas of expertise, and very interesting to listen to.

Not only has she written these two books but she also conducts workshops all round Australia, educating counsellors, doctors, psychologists etc, on many different aspects of domestic violence. You might like to visit her website....www.rickyhunter.org.

Here is the cover of her book.

 Check out her website, you will find some interesting information there.

Three Gorges Dam in China.

No matter where we are, no matter where our house sitting takes us, every morning Peter likes to read the newspapers online. He looks at the local ones, and the New Zealand ones to keep up to date with what's happening there too. Today he found an article about the Three Gorges Dam in China. Check out the pictures on this link.

http://www.news.com.au/travel/news/fast-and-furious-worlds-most-powerful-dam-in-full-operation/story-e6frfq80-1226435772794

Finally, after about 40 years of construction, this enormous dam has finally become fully functional. It’s the most amazing place to visit. When we lived in China we did a five day tour down the Yangtze River, down five locks that took us from the river level above to the river level below, about 200 meters difference, and then we went for a tour round the Three Gorges dam.

When I was young, I lived not far from the Arapuni Dam, sitting across the Waikato River in New Zealand. I got this photo from this website, I hope they don't mind me using this picture.

http://www.trevispa.eu/viewdoc.asp?co_id=517&pag=2

 

As you can see this is not a very large dam, but when you are a child driving across the top of it, it seemed pretty big. However, in comparison, the Three Gorges is huge. It is about 2 kilometers wide.  This is a photo I took in the display sections. This is a model of the area.

In the middle of the picture on the left is the dam itself. On the right of the picture in the middle is a model of the locks. There are five of them constantly in use, and boats huge and tiny have to go through this series of locks to get from the river level below to the level above. In the middle is what they call 'the lift'. It is possible to put a huge boat in here and lift it as if in an elevator right to the top.

We are on our boat going through the locks, on our way downstream. The one on the left is probably a coal barge. This is the type of boat we were on for our five day cruise. htp://www.193km.cn/cn/cruise/regal/2.asp

Whole new cities were built along the river to accommodate those people displaced when their villages and cities went under the rising waters. When the Chinese decide to do things they do them on a grand scale.

Part of the tour of the dam took us to a high lookout over the whole construction area. I think this must be part of the lock area.

 It looks terribly polluted, but actually the air all around here was full of mist too, there is a huge amount of water flowing through the turbines and churning out at the bottom of the dam. It was mid summer and the humidity levels were extremely high.

So having been there, its nice to know the whole thing is now working to its full capacity. The electric power it generates keeps a large part of Northern China going.

One of the questions you must ask about lawns.

When you are house sitting you get lawns from pocket handkerchief to huge. We've had everything from almost nil, a sandy little patch, to one and a half acres. If course we always asked about the size of the land, and what the home owner needed done while we were there, but we found out the importance of asking more detailed questions after a house sit in NSW.

The little sandy lawn took almost no looking after, it was in South Australia, dry, right beside the beach, and mid summer, so the grass hardly grew at all. Currently we are on one acre, and use a normal lawn mower for the flat area around the house, and Peter does all the sloping areas on a ride-on mower and uses a whipper snipper for part of the harder to reach areas.

However, we did have one house sit that had a very large lawn. We asked how big it was, and was told it was one and a half acres, but we didn't ask if they had a ride on. That was a mistake. We had already met the people when they were on holiday a couple of months earlier in the area we were already sitting. They were a lovely couple and told us all about the house which sounded really nice. We arrived, stayed the night with them and they left early the next morning. It wasn't until we got there we realised there was no ride-on mower.

Above: Part of the front lawn and drive.

At this point, I must be very fair, and tell you that they made it quite clear that if we needed to get people in to mow the lawns we could do that. They left us an envelope with more than enough money to cover any lawn mowing costs or other emergency costs, which was very good, but still, we were reluctant to spend their money unless it was absolutely necessary.

This home was really nice, big, spacious, fabulous kitchen, large pool, friendly outside only dog, haha, but huge gardens. He was a newly semi retired farmer, and quite fit, and he used to get outside and mow for the exercise and to keep himself busy on his little piece of land.

Above: Part of the back yard.


That land was flat, with many trees, and on what must have been prime furtile farmland before housing was established. It was midsummer, there had been quite a bit of rain, and it was fabulous grass growing weather.

Peter decided to get out the mower after a couple of days and start. Well, it took several long stints over a couple of days to get it done. The lawns were lush and thick, and looked lovely once mowed. But as soon as you had finished and sat down to enjoy your hard labour, you could see the grass growing again! Around the house he used the catcher but for the rest of the area he mulched it into the lawn. The whole area looked really good, but honestly, you could just hear the grass sniggering as it reached for the sky hour by hour.

After the first week or two, and already several mowings, I decided I would need to help too. There were two mowers, so we both got out there, pushing these mowers up and down and round and round the trees, trying to keep ahead of it all. It was a massive job.

Above: More back yard.


One time, after a few days of heavy rain, we tried to get someone with a ride-on to come and mow it over once, but they were too busy, so we got out there again. In the end, we enjoyed the work, and the exercise, but it was not quite what we expected. A couple of days before the owners came home we started the mowing rounds for the last time, this time catching it all, and I was the wheel-barrow girl, taking barrow after barrow of clippings to the huge compost areas they had at the back. The barrow was full after every three catchers full, so it was run to the compost, run back  because the next catcher full was ready for me.

Above: Are we there yet?  Nearly!

So when you are asking about the lawns, don't assume they have a ride-on mower for large areas of grass. Not everyone does!

Peter 1 and Peter 2.

Due to not so much to do, as I mentioned in my last post, I have been looking through some of my old computer files. I have about 20 or 30 discs that have got photos on them, most of which I have already transfered to my computer, but others that need sorting. Amongst these discs I found one that I had forgotten about for ages.

We lived in China for some time teaching English and at our first university was a student with, what is for Chinese students, an outstanding ability in writing. He wrote some really good stories. When someone learns a new language the first thing is the listening, then they copy what they hear so next comes the speaking. After that they learn to read the letters of the alphabet, and once they have those, and some basic grammar, they start to write. But for Chinese students, writing well in English is a very difficult thing to master. The grammar is all back to front to start with. In English you would say, 'have a happy day'. In Chinese you would say 'day day happy', or as they would actually say to us, 'happy every day'.

So for us to find such a good writer was really exciting. Not only that, but he had a bad accident when he was young, and his hand was blown off, so he only had one hand, the left hand ending at the wrist. To compensate, he made sure he learned things very well. He was also very good at drawing. So he put on a display outside the canteen one day with some of his drawings.

His name was Peter, so my Peter was Peter 1 and the student was Peter 2. Everyone knew them this way. My Peter taught Peter 2 for writing. One day my Peter told the class they would have to write a book over the next few weeks. There was horror on their faces! Write a book they gasped as one, except Peter 2. He set out over the next few months to write a book. Every week at his lesson he would hand in the next chapter in his book to be marked. He eventually finished the book just as we finished the year, and I edited it and gave him a copy on a disc as a gift. I actually kept everything he wrote, and I still have it all on disc.

I have kept in touch with him over the past few years, he is now working in an international trade company using his English every day, talking to customers all over the world. I am getting him to re-edit his work now that he is a bit older, and I just might see if I can do something with it. I think I'll investigate getting it published, even self published, and maybe into the Xinhua book shops. That'll keep me busy for a while on top of the other writing I do. I wish there was some way I could type while I was sitting on that dratted exercycle though!

Keep it moving.

One of the problems of house sitting is that there is often not so much to do to fill your days. For short stays, I don’t bother baking cakes, well I try not to eat much in that line anyway, and usually the houses are left spotless for us to go into, so maintaining them takes minimal work. Trying to eat healthy means meals are quite simple too, I make a lot of stir fry meals, and when cooking for two it doesn’t take long to get meals prepared, not like when I had all five children at home, including three boys who were bottomless pits. So housework doesn’t take much time either.

Generally there is not a lot to do in the gardens either, a bit of weeding maybe but I generally don’t prune anything or plant anything, so there’s not a lot of time used for gardening. Peter is the lawn mower, and I might potter round helping but he does most of it on a ride on mower in this house, so my exercise levels have reduced.

I decided I needed to get myself into gear and try to do something regular. It’s really nice walking around this area. All the homes are on what is called acreage, in other words large sections of about an acre or two, maybe more. So there are lots of trees, everything is well spaced out, and although there are a few dogs around, they are confined, so there are no dogs roaming on the streets. It also means there is not much traffic along this street or the surrounding area, which is a good thing as there are no concrete footpaths here.

So I started some daily walking, but somehow encouraged a heel spur. Have you ever had a heel spur? They are the most painful things. It also means that I need to wear shoes that support the arch in my foot all day, to get rid of the spur. Oh dear! My ideas don’t always go to plan.

This is the view from our corner, you can see what I mean, no footpaths, but hardly over populated.  A lovely area to walk around.

So I have reverted back to the excercycle that is here.  I have used it from time to time, but now it is getting a regular warm up. The knees creak a bit as I puff and pant my way through a few kilometres each day, but if I am going to get myself off the couch more I need to keep it going. I’ll keep you posted.

He came back.

I am pleased to say my bird came back. He, or she, arrived later in the day, and as usual asked for his daily bread. I was so pleased to see him.  He sat on the large pot plant calling me, and then as he ate the bread he talked to me, then with a larger piece of bread in his beak, sat on the edge of the pot, looked at me, and sang before he flew off. I am so pleased to see him back.

In case you have never heard a pied butcher bird, they are said to be one of the most beautiful of all Australian song birds.  Here are two recordings. One is a recording of butcher birds in the outback.

http://www.listeningearth.com.au/blog/a-beautiful-nature-sound-recording-pied-butcherbirds-in-the-australian-outback


Below is a youtube clip of a butcher bird recorded in someones back yard.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KfaplSc5ieM

The circle of life.

The weather is not nice, showers coming and going and heavy rain forecast over the next few days. One of the good features of our current home sit is that it has a very effective fire place.

When we first moved to Queensland, we considered the winters to be very warm, and when we would visit friends homes and see a fireplace, we would be amazed that anyone living in the 'tropics' would ever have a fire, even in the winter. Well, we have acclimatised now, and we get just as cold as the locals, and as our house is just at the foot of Mount Tamborine, we are a bit above sea level and we feel the cold at night. So we have fires.

On the fence line there are a few well established pine trees and from time to time we go down and collect some cones using them as kindling. The last time we got some was about two weeks ago, but there has been a bit of wind and more have fallen. Today I picked up a few more and there must be a change in the season, because this is the first time I have seen them sprouting like this. The green shoots are fresh growth.

 Many of them have what looks like pine needles sprouting and one or two have green tips coming from the cone and actually sticking into the soil. You can see the sprout on the top right of this cone.

I am no expert on pine cones, although I must say the design and they way the seeds are all layered is just amazing. But I was surprised to find I had to actually tug at this cone to get the sprout out of the grass. I guess it is the time of the year, but it was something I had never seen before. Life goes on.

On the other hand, life comes to an end. In almost every house we have lived in here in Australia we have had problems with birds flying into the windows. Not every day of course, but from time to time there is a bang as a bird hits the glass, sometimes gently and sometimes with significant force. I think it is something to do with reflections in the windows, where trees are reflected and the birds think it is safe to fly through. In one house, there was a bedroom window that was often flown into by birds.

Today Peter found one of the pied butcher birds outside the back door. I don't know if it is the one that usually comes to me for bread each day or not. Over the next couple of days, if he doesn't come back I will assume it was my bird. He was lying on the grass close to the house, so although we didn't hear any bang we assume he hit one of the windows.

Such a beautiful little bird. I'll really miss him.

Visit to Burning Mountain.

 Peter had read a newspaper article about Burning Mountain, a tourist spot not far from the town we were house sitting in New South Wales. He had a hankering to go and see this place, where an underground coal seam had been burning for thousands of years.

We planned our day and allowed time to visit one or two little towns on the way. Our trip down the New England Highway was uneventful.  There was no hurry, we were out on one of our day trip excursions, looking around, stopping for the views if we wanted, taking a few photos, stopping for a coffee if we felt so inclined.

The sign for Burning Mountain came into view. There was a car park on the left so we pulled off the road and drove into the reserve.

‘There’s not much here,’ I commented.

‘No,’ said Peter, a bit perplexed. ‘I can’t see any smoke anywhere.’
‘Let’s check out this information board,’ I said, ‘there must be some information here.’
We looked at the information board with some surprise.

 There certainly was some information but what we read did not impress us. The burning mountain was a long way off, we had to walk for about an hour or more to get there, it looked like it was quite a hilly hike, and we were absolutely unprepared to do any long distance walking. I just had some casual sandals on, and we had no spare water or food to take on a hike. The picture below is the beginning of the walk.

We looked at each other and giggled. What a pair of dopes. So much for being prepared. So much for researching the area. Peters highly anticipated visit to the burning coal seam suddenly became a non-event.

Of course, with our updated knowledge we have done some more research, and there is a website for the Burning Mountain, which makes it clear that a long hike is involved. Here is a quote from their website:

“Allow up to 2 hours for your return journey, and this walk will reward you with spectacular views over the Upper Hunter Valley and the chance to explore the burning head of the underground coal seam.

Follow this interesting path through a variety of landscapes and see the influence of the burning underground coal seam on vegetation. Take time to peruse the information panels and discover the fascinating story of Burning Mountain.

There are various resting places along the walk and at the summit there's a raised boardwalk to protect you from the deep cracks and crevices. This walk has some uphill sections.”

http://www.environment.nsw.gov.au/NationalParks/parkCulture.aspx?id=N0503

 We did have a lovely day out, and saw some cute little towns, one being a little place called Wingen.  It was one of those little towns with a pub and not much else.

Being unsure how to pronounce the name of this little town, we thought it must be pronounced with a hard ‘g’as in ‘gate’. But no, when talking to some locals they pronounced the ‘g’ like a ‘j’, as in ‘jar’. Ah, whinging, as in complaining. Hence some of the funny names on the pub there. Most pubs sell beer, and of course a few bottles of wine. Note the sign here for wingen and wining. Someone there has a sense of humour.

The moral of the story? Do some research before you head off. Lol.

Gold Coast Bookfest.

My daughter sent a text message asking if I wanted to go to the local Bookfest at the show grounds in Parklands. I don't usually go to those things, I have minimal self control when I'm around books. However, I gave in to temptation and went.

We went really early and there was a good crowd building as we left. There must have been twenty tables or more piled with books, but by the time I had done two tables, I had so many books I had to call it quits.  However, I did get one or two interesting books.

Over the past few years, studying for my BA and MA, I have had to read quite a bit of Australian literature. I have to say, it's a bit addictive. Unlike New Zealand, my home country, Australia has quite a rich legacy of early writings, and some of them are really good.

I'm not sure if you could call this 'literature', but I found Dame Edna's Bedside Companion. Printed by Corgi Books in 1982, it is pretty old fashioned in many ways, but still holds a few gems that housewives can learn from. One that really appealed was, 'No one ever died of sleeping in an unmade bed'. So if you are one of the un-fastidious housewives who doesn't get the bed made every day, don't worry, you are not going to die from it.

Peter is a great fan of Macca on Sunday mornings on ABC. I didn't know he has published some books, but there were several on the Australiana table and I got two for Peter. He has had his nose in them ever since, giggling and chuckling.

I got a two book set of everything that Banjo Patterson ever wrote, that will take me a while to get through, several books of short stories which is my favourite genre, The Man from Snowy River, and one of my all time favourites, Tirra Lirra by the River by Jessica Anderson. If you have not read this book, its worth getting it from the library.

Another one that will take a bit of reading is My Place, by Sally Morgan, an Aboriginal writer. I have read snippets in the past and was delighted to find it also on the Australiana table.

Apart from those, there are about another dozen books gracing the bookcase that we will slowly work our way through. You should have seen Peter's face when I staggered into the house with several bags full of books. I told you I had minimal self control around books. However I did learn one important lesson, there were people there with suitcases on wheels, filling them up. Now, thats the way to do it! Next time I'll do the same.



People love their local wildlife.

One of the things that we really enjoy is finding what sort of wildlife lives around the houses we house sit. It seems obvious, that most Australians have a soft spot for whatever lives within their own area, and it warms our hearts to see the local wildlife cared for. We are softies in this regard too.

We had one house sit where there was a large family of kookaburras living close by. There was quite a large stand of well established trees out the back of the garden and they lived in there. They came around the house several times a day. We were delighted when we found out from the owners as they were showing us around their home that they fed the kookaburras each night with a little left over meat.

This was a very pretty garden, and the kookaburras came regularly. In the background is the stand of trees where the kookaburras lived.


In the past we have had aviaries and bred birds, so Peter was thrilled to bits. On our first trip to the local supermarket he got a small packet of mince, and started to make friends with them. It didn't take long before we were accepted as part of the furntiture. Peter had some of them eating out of his hand within a few weeks.

Another species that seems to live in many parts of Australia is the king parrot. Whereas the kookaburras are quite noisy, chattering away, laughing and flying around, the king parrots are absolutely silent. You don't know they are there until you see them. We have often been surprised to suddenly see a pair of them close by. They don't seem to like us to get too close, but like the other birds, once they know you are there, they seem to accept you more. This pair below would often come in the afternoon. They are truly beautiful birds.

The people in this house on the Sunshine Coast had a bird feeder on the back fence, and most afternoons these beautiful parrots would come and fill up.

Another house sit in NSW had a huge back garden and although you can't see much in this picture, there was a bird feeder in the trees, and this little table and chairs lived there so the owners, and we, could take our afternoon tea out there and watch the birds in the late afternoon. This was another garden that had king parrots visit regularly.

Our present house sit has a different kind of wildlife. There are quite a few species of birds. We have kookaburras that live in some very tall gum trees on the front lawn, but we never have any contact with them. They greet the dawn every day and say goodnight at dusk every night, but we have never been able to get close to them.

There are the usual lorrikets, several varieties actually, crested pidgeons, minahs, often galahs, and from time to time we know sulphur crested cockatoos are in the area, we can hear their screeching. We often sit and watch the lorikeets, they are so noisy and bossy. This home has a large garden of about an acre. The front lawn is sloping and planted with lots of well established trees that attract quite a few birds.

At the back we have another large area of lawn planted with many trees. Right up the back is what I call, 'the little wilderness' area. It is a little more overgrown, on rather steep land. We have seen pheasants, bush turkeys and possums.

I'm sure there are a few hidey holes for snakes up there too. One of the more unusual animals we have are some hares. They often come down to the front lawn at night and forage around. We saw a dead hare up the road one day and wondered if it was one of ours, but we have since seen ours around about.

Other visitors we have daily are a famly of pied butcher birds. They live somewhere close by. Every morning one or two of them come for bread. One of them is much tamer and he sits on a large pot by the back door, chattering to me, waiting til I bring out something for him. I haven't been able to hand feed him yet, but he is okay when I get quite close to him. He, or she, eats and chatters and talks away for quite a long time, then eventually takes off with any left overs.

There are very few cats in the area and only a few dogs, and they don't roam free, so the birds seem to feel quite safe. Having such close contact with these fabulous creatures in many different settings is one of the best things about house sitting.

Bunning's has just opened down the road.

Not far from our current house sit a huge, brand spanking new Bunning’s has just opened.

There is something special about Bunning’s. All us girls know that an Aussie Bloke is not much of a bloke unless he has his ‘shed’. Well, Bunning’s is just a bigger version of the ‘blokes shed’, and I think generally speaking is the material centre of every bloke’s universe.

Us girls potter in the kitchen. Our pottering is productive, about 1,000 meals a  year and about the same number of snacks. A man will potter in his shed. His productivity is usually less though, perhaps replacing the lawn mower blades, or counting the nails and screws in the jars.

Us girls might browse around the dress shops, open and close a few handbags and potter around the bling. A man will plan his trip to Bunning’s with precision, allowing plenty of time to research the necessary information, measure and write down his requirements, and double check with the wife that he has got it right. Then, filled with anticipation, he will enter the sacred aisles and work his way from one end of the massive building to the other, comparing, contemplating and checking prices. He will drool unashamedly over the tools, check out the paint charts, make sure no new model of the Dutch hoe has been invented since his last visit, spend quite some time deciding if he needs a stake for the tomatoes, (no he doesn’t need one, he hasn’t planted any tomatoes) then investigate the storage section to see what’s new.

Once the preliminaries are over, he will get down to the serious business of buying what he came down for. He gets out his little piece of paper, and heads off to the appropriate section. This area needs particular skill, because the variety is enormous and he must get exactly what he wants.

After a great deal of checking and measuring, with his treasures in his hot little hands he heads off to the checkout to pay for the parsley plant or bag of nails or screws he has bought.

He knows that when he gets home he will get the third degree. “Where have you been? What took you so long? I was going to send out a search party. You know I get worried if you are gone for hours and I don’t know where you are. I thought you must have run off with some floozy” . . .etc.

In an injured voice only a man can put on when he is guilty of some misdemeanour, he lets us know it was our fault, we wanted the shelf fixed, or a screw put in  here or there, or a new parsley plant. He knows, and we know that he already has 25 jars of assorted nails and screws in his shed, but we give a little smile and tell him how good he is to keep the house well maintained.

Of course, he knows, and we know, that we are pleased to get him out of the house for a few hours, so we can watch a chick-flick and he can feel useful. I’m sure I’ll think of something I’ll need done next weekend.

Oh, and by the way, I’m not averse to picking up the odd pot plant either.